Doyle's Fish & Hicky Bar

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Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Side Effects

     One pleasant by product of aging, at least for me, has been the ability to buy more or less what I want, and when I want it.   Of course there is a preface to this.      After all these years of struggling to accumulate stuff that I desperately needed, Ive found that I'm just about full of all that and can now concentrate on things I want.   Sounds cool, huh?
     It has it's own weird little side effects though.  
Flash back to a time when I had just enough money to buy an album.   Just one and I even had to budget for that.   I was then stuck listening to this album night and day until I knew every aural nuance in every cut and groove.   It became one of my favorites and 40 years later I can still  sing along in near perfect unison with it.   Grand Funk Railroad, "Closer to Home".
     Flash forward a few more years, I had a little more disposable income and decided that it was time I stopped budgeting so hard to buy  music.  I was sick of doing without when I was surrounded by people who seemed to have everything they wanted.  In my mind I DESERVED it.   I bought a lot of albums at one time.   Like 15.    I felt absolutely wealthy and truly I was.   I mean, when you get exactly what you want you should be happy.   Eh?  
     When I got the albums home I listened to them rapidfire,  one at a time.    Now, I know that was a terrible mistake.    I couldn't absorb any of the music as there was simply too much of it.   I felt like I had to hurry to the next one and maybe there I would find that elusive perfect melody.    I wound up storing this music for years.   I only listened to a little of it and really dont remember hardly any of it now.   If I had bought one album and listened to it over and over I would have found the art and the beauty of the lyric and notes.   Jumping to the conclusion that there was something momentus going on that vinyl disk.    I missed it.   But before I beat myself up to much I will admit I'm a slow learner.
     Flash forward even more years.   Disposable income is about the same but I learned to save it better and make myself able to buy larger WANTS.    Sometime during all this I had just about taken care of all my NEEDS and they are greatly reduced.     I finally discovered that buying crap and sticking it on a shelf really isn't all that fun.   That each piece, whatnot, or album must have some connection to me other than my ability to just buy it.    I've begun to spend with great discretion.     I hunt for that item that will make my life or the lives of those closer to me better.    When I accomplish that the side effect is my personal happiness increasing.
     Sometimes material items become weighty and require their own upkeep, space, and effort to stay current.   I'm drifting away from all that wasted energy now.    It seems like energy is not such an endless commodity as it once was.    The side of effects of buying things can be so fun and enjoyable but they can also become their own PIA.    Im finding that the things I keep are in the latter, but the stuff I give away are the former.    Who would have thought of such cool and evident side effects from seperating my wants from my needs.